WANT GREATER WHOLENESS?

SOLEMATE WEEKEND WORKSHOP!3/16-18, 2012 at Kripalu Lenox, MA

Are you ready to gain mastery over your own life? Many people spend years waiting for a “soul mate” to make them feel complete. Others settle for difficult or unfulfilling or relationships out of fear of being alone. Instead of depending on someone else to make you whole, this workshop takes you on a life-changing journey to greater self-mastery, empowerment, and well-being—whether you’re living your life on your own or in a relationship. For more info or to register, click here.

The Art of Psychotherapeutic Coaching

I'll be presenting my psychotherapeutic coaching method, Illumineering, 12/8 at the 12/5-11 Psychology of Health, Immunity and Disease Conference in Hilton Head, South Carolina. I'll be speaking with Joan Borysenko, Bruce Lipton, David Whyte, Ronald Siegel, and many more great presenters. Click here for more info.

Solemate French Edition!

Solemate by Lauren Mackler

Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life!

 

Solemate is now available in French! Solemate is about mastering the art of aloneness, but it's not about being alone. International bestseller, Solemate, gives you the tools you need to develop the self-awareness and life skills to live a full, happy, successful, and financially secure life—with or without a partner. To order the new French edition, click here. To order in English, click here.

Liberate Your Authentic Self Workshop!

3/25-3/27, 2011 at Kripalu in Stockbridge, MA Imagine what life would be like if you could reclaim your innate strengths, free yourself from the limiting patterns that keep a lid on your potential, and fully activate your potential in every aspect of your life! That’s what this life-changing weekend promises! Join world-renowned coach, radio host, and bestselling author of Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life, Lauren Mackler, to liberate your Authentic Self, unleash your potential, and create a life you love! For more information and registration, call 866.200.5203 or click here.

Review of Lauren Mackler’s Solemate

January 4, 2011 by T.U. Dawood

Lauren Mackler has put her heart and soul into Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life, a Hay House publication that walks readers through the importance of finding completion within oneself.  She believes that first one must be whole because connecting with others.

She shares her own life story and experience as a prelude and support to the exercise and the guidelines she shares to help readers achieve wholeness.

Chapters like “Uncovering Your Unconditioned Self” talk about how you are born full of all emotions and free to express them.  Growing up in a family unit starts affecting how you feel about your emotions and which you start expressing and most particularly repressing.  Unprogramming yourselves from this is a very challenging thing to be but can have immense rewards for through this effort you can discover what your true preferences are and then make decisions that are best for you, not what other people may think is best for you.

Mackler continues this process through her “Living Deliberately Versus by Default” chapter where she suggests:

• Sending loving messages to yourself
• Taking good care of yourself
• Do nice things for yourself
• Set boundaries with other people
• Become your own advocate
• Believe in yourself
• Be compassionate

She culminates these suggestions with her chapter “Bringing Your Vision to Life,” where she has created exercises to facilitate and expedite a reader’s achievement of the goals of the book. Exercise One identifies the most important attributes of your ideal life, Exercise Two teaches you how to write a Life Vision statement, Exercise Three identifies barriers you may face, Exercise Four helps you narrow an action plan to three specific goals, Exercise Five helps you develop a set of action steps to help you achieve those goals and Exercise Six facilitates the creation of a new life structure.

There is a lot of depth and immense soul in Solemate, and if you are able to read through the over 300 pages of text, you will emerge much more confident and happier about yourself.  The exercises to are useful, but definitely involve work and action on your part.  This is not the passive, lazy guide to loving yourself.  That being said, if you choose to walk through Mackler’s program, you will likely find yourself on the heels of a successful appreciation of yourself and a mastery of the Art of Aloneness. The perfect place to be if you want to fall in love.

T. U. Dawood is a freelance journalist. Check out her self-optimization website Preview Your Life.

SOLEMATE: The Art of Wholeness Workshop

November 26–28, 2010 - Kripalu, Lenox, MA Many people spend years waiting for a “soul mate” to complete them. Others settle for unfulfilling relationships out of fear of being alone. This life-changing workshop lifts the social stigma of aloneness and provides a groundbreaking roadmap for gaining mastery of your own life so you can achieve a sense of wholeness and well-being on your own or in a relationship. In this powerful weekend with bestselling author, coach, and psychotherapist, Lauren Mackler, you will learn how to:

• Uncover the hidden roots of fear, low self-esteem, and self-sabotaging behaviors
• Become whole and complete on your own
• Build a loving, respectful, and caring relationship with yourself
• Develop a strong inner and outer support system
• Clarify your life vision and strategies to achieve it.

Rather than expecting someone else to complete you, learn how to become the partner you seek—your own cherished solemate! For people who are single, divorced, or seeking greater independence within their partnership.  For more information or to register, click here.

Are You Living Big or Playing Small?

MANY PEOPLE DREAM OF CHANGING THEIR LIVES, but remain stuck in their status quo. They may tell themselves their goals are unrealistic, or tolerate dissatisfying situations because they feel undeserving of anything better. Each of us is born with tremendous potential, but it becomes buried beneath self-defeating beliefs and behaviors rooted in childhood, that we keep perpetuating in our adult lives. Living boldly means living a life in which your innate potential is liberated, and you’re free to realize your greatest dreams. Instead of being trapped in a life full of excuses and frustration, you’re actively creating a life that you love…To read the entire article click here.

Managing Up

There are many seminars, books, and articles about how to be an effective leader. But what is often missing from these resources is how to strategically shape and manage relationships with superiors. As a result, many people harbor feelings of stress, overwhelm, frustration, or resentment toward their boss, but keep them hidden for fear of reprisal. Over time, their motivation and performance diminish, putting their job at risk. Below are some practical strategies for building a mutually productive and respectful relationship with your boss, managing expectations and workloads, and positioning yourself as an exceptional leader within your organization.

Understand your boss's work style and preferences. Is your boss formal or informal? Does he like to be briefed in writing before meetings or prefer to brainstorm issues with you? Is your supervisor a hands-on manager who likes to be consulted about issues as they arise, or will regular and informal updates make your boss think you aren't taking the lead in performing your managerial role? While you might think your manager would be pleased that you keep her in the loop, his work style may value a manager who acts more autonomously. Pay attention to the differences in your work style and your boss's style. Where possible, make adjustments to be consistent in style, eliminating unnecessary annoyances that can build into real miscommunications.

Know what matters to your boss. If your boss is a numbers person, quantify your results. And know which numbers matter most to her. If your boss is a customer-is-first kind of person, frame all your results in terms of benefits to customers.

Communicate like your boss. If your boss likes daily e-mails, send them. If your boss wants a once-a-week summary, then do that. Convey information to your boss in the way she likes, so she’s more likely to retain it. Be aware of detail preferences. Some people like a lot and some people like less. A good way to figure out what your boss wants is to watch how she communicates with you. She’s probably doing it the way she likes best.

Plan and organize your meetings to optimize your time together. Keep a running list of follow up and action items to discuss with your boss.

Learn to say no. Say yes to the things that matter most to your boss. So when he asks you to do something that you don’t have time to do, ask your boss about his priorities. Let him know that you want to make sure you finish what is most important, and this will probably mean saying no to the lesser projects.

Toot your own horn. Each time you do something that impacts the company, let your boss know. Leave a voicemail announcing a project has been completed. Send a congratulation e-mail to your team and copy your boss, which not only draws attention to your project success, but also to your leadership skills. Send a monthly overview of your completions and accomplishments, retaining an electronic file to use for performance review time.

Build a relationship with your boss. If all things are equal, your boss will cater to the person she likes the best. So go out to lunch and talk about what interests her. Connect with her by asking her for advice on something about work. If you are very different than your boss, work hard to find common ground in your conversations.

Seek new responsibilities. Find important holes in your department before your boss notices them. Take responsibility for filling those holes and your boss will appreciate not only your foresight, but also your ability to take initiative.

Be curious. Remember to make time to listen and ask good questions. You will make yourself more interesting to be around, and you will elicit fresh ideas from everyone around you. Your boss will feel like having you on the team improves everyone’s work, even his own, and that, after all, is your primary job in managing up.

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE, BLOG, OR WEB SITE? You can, as long as you include this complete statement at the end of the article:

© 2010 Lauren Mackler

Lauren Mackler is a coach, keynote speaker, and training facilitator. She’s the author of the international bestseller, Solemate, and co-author of Speaking of Success with Jack Canfield and Stephen Covey. For info about her coaching services or training programs, contact her through her web site at www.laurenmackler.com.

Solemate Review by Joan Borysenko!

Solemate Review by Joan Borysenko! Author of It's Not the End of the World: Developing Resilience in Times of Change

“I had the pleasure to be on Lauren Mackler's Life Keys radio show (every Thursday 1-2pm EST) on HayHouseRadio.com. What a delight Lauren is. Smart, insightful, real, and full of excellent advice. Lauren is the author of the international bestseller, Solemate: Master the Art of Aloneness & Transform Your Life. The book is a real page-turner. Lauren's life story is riveting . . . from the magic of marrying a handsome young physician and moving overseas to recognizing that she'd lost herself in the needs of another. She came back to the States broke, dispirited, and with two kids to support. Lauren recovered from depression and became a celebrated therapist, author, and coach. She provides warm and wise advice about the core issues that prevent us from being happy and at home in our own skin. She's the real deal and I think you'll really enjoy her book.”